First, I think that patriotism and nationalism are two terms that “the Society” consistently (and wrongly) conflates.
Patriotism is completely harmless. All it means is that you support your country, hope it is prosperous, successful, etc..
Nationalism could be negative/harmful. At its worst, it could mean that you think your country is the greatest, fuck everyone else, you all suck, go to hell, etc..
That being said, I don’t think I’ll ever be a big flag waver. My father (never a JW) worked for the Department of Defense for around 40 years. Pretty much every round of 120mm ammo that’s been shot from an American tank since the 70s has his fingerprint on it (he led R&D of 120mm tank ammunition).
Even so, he has never flown a flag at his home, and feels no need wear his allegiance to the USA on his sleeve. His patriotism amounts to his contribution to the safety and welfare of troops and US citizens via the weapons program he spent his life on. That’s it.
I kind of feel the same. Any jerk can wave a flag or sing a song. I think the most patriotic thing anyone can do is do their best to contribute something, big or small, to their community/country. In my opinion, people who do this — quietly, with little or no recognition — are some of the most patriotic people there are.